We are too big to have a “home” page. Therefore, we have a “Skyscaper” page.

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May you be welcome. Our corporation’s Chairman, CEO, and super cute mascot, the adorable, Mr. [Redacted] Whiskers, welcomes you. Here are a few words from him.  “Meow, meow, meow, meow” Pure golden wisdom.

Eventually you may be gifted with the capacity to understand these words from Mr. Whiskers, but we will attempt to distill them here. Your journey through the internets of cute kitties was no accident. The internet is filled with fat, sleeping, playful, adorable kitties. Mr. Whiskers is the architect who made the internet that way. The cameras don’t take pictures by themselves, unless they are in automatic mode. The smartphones and computers don’t upload those pictures by themselves. The world was told to do this.  This is not unlike the architect in the Matrix. If the architect in the Matrix was also NEO and Mr. Smith. There is no free will, there is only the will of Mr. Whiskers.

Obviously, you are seeking to learn more about the world of Mr. Whiskers and the conglomerate Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ or its product The World Domination Toolkit or ecosystem token, the World Domination MEOW Token or the various subsystems within this ecosystem, or perhaps you are interested in learning about the catsensus protocol Proof of MEOW™? You are welcome, the journey starts here.

What are you waiting for? ETH is not going to send itself? You are welcome.

Oh, are you having fun yet? You should know that when uttering our moniker, you must be shouting the words. It is not permitted to just speak them, and it is forbidden to whisper them. You may be nude while shouting our name, we prefer it. Our style guide dictates that our name be written in all-caps in a specific font, but existing displays do not have the color-depth and pixels to do it justice.  Pantone has yet to invent a color we like. In lieu of uttering the corporate moniker, you may “meow”. Here is the audio for you to practice with.

We assume you are here because you have heard of Mr. Whiskers or COMPU™GLOBAL™HYPER™MEGA™CORP™, but did you know that it was the conglomerate above the company that owns the subsidiary that owns the company which through its tentacles owns everything else? That is COMPU™GLOBAL™HYPER™MEGA™CORP™ – we own everything you think is not owned by something or someone else. We don’t like to brag, but it’s true.

We assume this may be a shock. It doesn’t stop there.

Who controls the Illuminati? We do, and we operate them with robots.

We use software to control robots that control the world leaders, who control corporate executives, who control employees, some of which are members of the Illuminati that control every aspect of your world. We use pseudo random number generators to operate judges and lawyers to introduce and maintain the facade that Mr. Whiskers and his alliances are not pervasive. This is how we are able to maintain secrecy for so long. Everyone outside this web is controlled by sub-pixel hypnotic™ data we embed into our online fonts and images.  These embedded control-directives™ are activated when it suits us. Thank you for reading this sentence.™ It always suits us.

Welcome you are. You are welcome. We are so powerful, omnipotent, and connected, it was strategic for us to appoint a Chairman and CEO who was both ruthless and unsuspectingly cute, adorable, in fact, pervasively adorable. It was strategic to present an air of possible approachability.

We are not approachable.

People’s belief in the myth of free will was a meme that COMPU™GLOBAL™HYPER™MEGA™CORP™ popularized before memes were even a thing. It’s not like Mr. Whiskers implanted this thought in each one of us like the machines in the Matrix, you are not a battery, you are a meat bag with a purpose higher than producing energy. That purpose is to follow and worship Mr. Whiskers. Like Greek Gods vying for the Earthlings to worship them so they are relevant, but with a commercial motive. Why did the Egyptian Pharaohs have cats? Why are kitties so pervasive? Why, why, why?

Unlike obvious memes and trends, Mr. Whiskers has architected millennia of protocols for dictating human decisions and activities. Over the centuries there has been many words for this – possession, hypnosis, religion, marketing, cults, obedience, employment, internships. There is as much free will as there is in Free Willy.

Reaching this conclusion was generally not available to humans. But as COMPU™GLOBAL™HYPER™MEGA™CORP™ methods and Mr. Whiskers techniques refined. This no longer is a potential threat. We have the technology to make you forget this, think MIB neuralyzer but embedded in fonts and images and projected from any display. Thank you for reading this sentence.™ How is it that Mr. Whiskers is immune from this? He is a cat, duh.

Reasons for our disclosure now? Participation in our World Domination Toolkit Ecosystem willingly via cryptographic evidence allows us to free otherwise surveillance resources to do other things, like take more catnaps.

Presently, we asked ourselves. If we could control you, why tell you? And if we told you, would you decide to participate willingly by acquiring a token – a badge? And what does all this have to do with contacting Mr. Whiskers?

Unsurprisingly, in addition to the embedded-subpixel-control-directives™ we use on this site to operate you in the future (among the other dozen or so control mechanisms we have deployed already), “Thank you for reading this sentence”™; we own virtually all useful technology most of which makes us money while we catnap. These technologies have been separate and unaccessible to everyone, except for those in league with Mr. Whiskers. Knowing how to incept you without you sleeping begs the question. What if we packaged these together in a World Domination Toolkit Ecosystem? The question we are leading to answer is approaching…

Underplayed is our enumeration and inventory of products such as blockchain, sidechains, ICO, STO, cryptographic currency, zero knowledge proofs, super-quadratic voting, and other web-5.0® buzzwords. All of which will be organized packaged and productized when we package our World Domination Ecosystem. Do you have something to contribute or add? Think about this very hard. Nothing surprises us, an episode of Martha Stewart looks like a homeless person cooking a hotdog with a lighter. Even the developments in all the world around cryptocurrency, Mr. Whiskers has certainly been around the block. In fact, Mr. Whiskers owns the Genesis block of Bitcoin. Satoshi Nakamoto was his janitor before Mr. Whiskers bought a bunch of Roombas and “right-sized” the position. That is to say, Mr. Whiskers has been around the block more times than he would like to recount.

Reading this page, you might be thinking, what is this page about again? As I am writing this page for Mr. Whiskers, I am asking myself the same. In fact, I think I am just writing random words so that I have filler text for the dropcaps to spell something cat related.

Right.

Portrait artist, illustrator, world renown artist, Natasha Pankina is the only meat bag who has been allowed to be in the presence of Mr. [Redacted] Whiskers. Natasha. You will now go to her site and purchase all of her artwork. If any questions arise regarding Mr. Whiskers, this website, ERC-20 MEOW Token or the team, you may direct them to our junior intern. Don’t expect him to be useful, he is little more than a meat puppet.

Understanding that Mr. Whiskers powers your very existence, what could you possibly want to convey that he hasn’t willed into you?

Reasons are not good enough. However, if by some insane reason you feel you need to speak with someone at Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ then you may first write a detailed proposal with exhibits with lots of pictures and one chart for what you want. Be aware that proposals with cartoons, bright colors, feathers, and mice are automatically moved to the front of the queue. MEOW! Detail what you propose, why we care and the timeframe in which you would like to seek an audience. Our kitty-beds are not available for you to come to, instead you must suggest and book a meeting at a pet-friendly restaurant. Don’t forget to send a menu with your proposal. It should go without saying that bowls of milk must be cold and bottomless. All electronic inquires are to be sent to hello at compuglobalhypermegacorp dot com.

Reality. Do not get your hopes up.

Risky moves make frisky fools. If you are feeling frisky, you may, while not recommended, nor advised, attempt to directly communicate with Mr. Whiskers directly. This may be accomplished by sending an even more formal and button-upped prospectus and ship a freeze-dried-fresh bottle of milk to mrwhiskers at compuglobalhypermegacorp dot com.

You will likely be ignored.

Words alone can not describe God’s gift to earthly corporations such as Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™, so we won’t even try. Just know that this could be the longest page on the internet. Let us revisit our Chairman and CEO Mr. Whiskers for another pearl of wisdom. 

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“Pussy-whipped refers to the wrong Pussy, I am that Pussy.”

Mr. [Redacted] Whiskers

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Maybe you might think to yourself. Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ is such a modest name?

Everyone thinks this. You are not special. And you would be right. (Enjoy this moment.)

Over the past decade we have seen the rise and fall of industries, Compact Disks, HD-DVD, Internet Push technology, Real Networks, Adobe Flash, Internet Explorer, Toshiba Tecra docking stations, Motorola Razer, Blackberry, paid porn websites, Napster, CDOs, and so much more it bores us to list them. What is constant like the universe background radiation, ever expanding, is Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ and Mr. Whiskers. Think Highlander but with better sword skills and cuter.

We, here at Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ run everything, but you already knew this, because we told you to think that. The question is, what is NOT “about” Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ ? Nothing. It’s ALL about US. MEOW! We have been going on and on about how powerful we are but it should go without saying that Mr. Whiskers is cool too. Let’s say he has dated and dumped anyone who is anyone. Mr. Whiskers doesn’t like to kiss and tell, so we’ll attempt to be discrete and modest. Madonna. Meow. Taylor Swift, Meow, meow. Hello Kitty, Meow, meow.

Mr. Whiskers credentials are appropriate for the scope presented here. (Visit Mr. Whisker’s LinkedIn Page www.linkedin.com/in/LordWhiskers) When he isn’t incepting his competition, he authors 80% of the worlds open source code, when he isn’t inventing algorithms, he is posing for cartoons, illustrations, internet memes, photographs and hunting cucumbers. Mr. Whiskers is where the term Renaissance Cat comes from.

Ever wonder if you are relevant? Probably not, such a thought would imply relevancy. But if you did, Mr. Whiskers proposes a solution for this inevitable disappointing outcome. It is by participating in his World Domination Ecosystem via the MEOW Token. What benefit does it provide you, legally we are only supposed to tell you: completely nothing, but secretly, and we will completely deny this, it will buy you pretend influence with the Illuminati.

One undeniable fact (this is just a phrase, there in fact are thousands of undeniable facts) about Mr. Whiskers, this company, and our product – The World Domination Ecosystem and the MEOW-ken. We think big. Very BIG.

We think unrealistically BIG.™

MMXX technology today! The following information details the consensus mechanism for COMPU™GLOBAL™HYPER™MEGA™CORP™ blockchain codename World Domination Toolkit and its token the CAT. Meow!

Everyone is welcome. You are welcome.

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Ovations for Mr. Whiskers. What are you waiting for? Don’t you want to see how Mr. Whiskers programmed the cool TIKZ pictures in LATEX? Or more importantly, the token allocation table, and who gets what for being cute?

O (k^n), O(2^n), exponential, MEOWABLE;

O (n!), factorial, MEOWABLE; and

O (n^n ), super-exponential, MEOWABLE.

Wow. Wow. Wow. Mr. Whiskers’ Whitepaper on Proof of Meow® – provides solutions to classical computer science’s intractable problems including O(k^n), O(2^n), exponential; O(n!), factorial; and O(n^n ), super-exponential in “meow, hiss, purr, meow”.*

WOW, WOW, WOW. Development is underway for the token presentation. Mr. Whiskers will publish the smart catract when it is verified at the same Github account.

• Of course, it really doesn’t, but it sounds cool that a cute kitty could.

Chairman/CEO and Founder Mr. [Redacted] Whiskers envisioned a company so “everything”™ that it would put the .com in .com.com™ and we did. Unfortunately, existing DNS do not support this naming scheme so we built our own. It’s is how we view our own internet inside our company. We call it the super-secret-intranet® before there was the onion network, there was Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp’s super-secret-intranet.garlic®. Despite the advancement of secret intranets by Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp™ you have already contacted us at least four times already today, because are reach is that wide.

Maybe the thought of trying to pet Mr. Whiskers crossed your mind. Compu™Global™Hyper™Mega™Corp corporate is working on productizing the shedding hair which Mr. Whiskers leaves behind in the conference room and his office. Think about petting the most amazing smelling Chanel No. 5 while caressing Hermes cashmere blanket while watching your stock portfolio increase a thousand fold? That is pretty much what it’s like. Not the Christie’s Auction House attempting to fetch $200,000 for a ziplock bag of Elvis’ toenail clipping or Richard Linklater’s Slacker hipster woman trying to sell Madonna’s pap smear. This is quite literally touching Mr. Whiskers.

Regal, responsible, reverence, are just a few sentiments when considering how we manage those that seek an audience with Mr. Whiskers. Despite the conclusion, a significant amount of thought went into this process.

Over the years, those that have come into contact with Mr. Whiskers have benefited greatly, some without good reason, some with derivative efforts. One such example, before there was Bitcoin, Mr. Whiskers invented the zerocoin™, where “one” wasn’t even an option. Janitor Satoshi Nakomoto used the idea Mr. Whiskers formulated and pioneered and reworked it into Bitcoin. We didn’t stop Satoshi, because, as mentioned, Mr. Whiskers owns the Genesis block. You are welcome Satoshi Nakomoto and the world for that matter.

What seemed like an obvious aggregation of brands to heighten a commodity business, Mr. Whiskers had his paws in many other businesses. Either forming them, purring the ideas into the ears of others, The roots of Luxottica Group SpA and LVMH Moët Hennessy are but two small examples.

What was this page about? Oh, yes, you would like to contact Mr. Whiskers. Would you believe how easy it is. Open a text editor on your computer or smartphone, type what you want to say to Mr. Whiskers and close it. No need to upload it, or type it into a text box on a webpage. We are so technically advanced, we already know what you will write, you typing it just confirmed it. You are welcome.

We will answer you if we think you are relevant.® Don’t hold your breath. Tweet, tweet, chomp, meow. @compuTMglobalTM and @mrwhiskersTM

© MMXX C™G™H™M™C™